I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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