Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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