We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
