I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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