Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
