I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
third nipple confirmed
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
