Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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