drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
