my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
