I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
