Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
