There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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