I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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