The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
