physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize