When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
