It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
