once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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