I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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