he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
