I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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