Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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