You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Randomize
