how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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