I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
