He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Randomize