Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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