Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
