I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Randomize
