so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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