Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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