i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
