I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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