are you still at the devil's house?
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
