I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
