this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
she smelled like a LAN party
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
