their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I cut my penus on the lid.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
