i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
