She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
