Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Be still, my beating vagina.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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