hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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