After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
