I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
