Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
