Whod you bang
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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