Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
