I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
