I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
