BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
