Who wears a wallet chain?!
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
