He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I love you. Go after that dick
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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