i think i have herpe
just one?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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